Something is amiss about today. I can’t necessarily pinpoint why I feel so frivolous and mindless, but it’s making me a bit depressed. I feel a little better after a shower, but I feel like I have nothing to look forward to today. I’ll probably get stoned and just listen to Electric Wizard all night at work, come home, study, wake up, move my car and then study some more. There’s not much to look forward to, I guess. I’m certainly not looking forward to this test on Tuesday. I’m certainly looking forward to the exemption of my 8 AM class on Thursday. I hate the weekdays. They’re pretty dull and mundane. I can’t wait for summer. It was so summer-esque last week, a trend that has shifted back to this limbo of cool days and colder nights. Mother Nature needs to make up her mind. This fence-sitting with the weather displeases me and doesn’t do any wonders for my mood. I’d write her a letter if I could, but she’d never read it. She probably doesn’t have time for fan mail.
My roommate is listening to a band that sounds like a prepubescent boy singing into a microphone, with tempo and structure changes intermittent throughout a song (usually from an upbeat major scale pop/punk style to an atonal and dissonant breakdown complete with the screams of an adolescent upper-middle class white guy who’s brokenhearted because his love interest at the local high school refuses to acknowledge he exists, most likely due to the fact that he hasn’t tried to communicate with her at all). Regardless of my personal interpretation of the song, it sucks. And my roommate is asleep through all of this. How, I don’t know. Jaymo is taking a nap on the couch, snoring, dead to the world. I wish I could have a Sunday like this, one in which I don’t have to work, but I could build a day of chilling out, napping, studying, eating, studying, smoking and finally sleeping. I finally get a morning shift for next Sunday after asking for them from my job for about three months. It’s about time.
I’m just…complacent? I guess? I don’t know what’s wrong with me today. Just feeling under the weather, tired, depressed and dreadful. The only solace that will soothe this displacement is either my beautiful girlfriend or when I lay my head down to sleep. I could settle for coming home to hang out with Jaymo and Caleb as long as it’s just the two of them, but Jaymo is leaving soon and Caleb will be asleep.
Goddammit I’m hungry. I’m going to get a snack from 7-11, study and play some computer games before going to work. Tomorrow will be better, I swear. It’s just a fog that needs to dissipate. I’ll make tomorrow better, weather permitting or not.
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